I’m out and now I can’t sleep

It’s 1:52 am and I’m sitting in my children’s father’s living room wide awake. Mostly I think i’m so awake because I fell asleep at 8pm after having so little sleep after the events of the night before. Also, maybe i’m awake because I don’t have to be worried anymore, I’m in a safe place with a very optimistic future.

When I left yesterday, I left a note to the ex, that I would have the movers there next month on the 16th, and to please make sure he was there (I want him there so he can’t accuse me of taking any of his precious crap), I didn’t tell him where I was going, just that I had found a place to stay until my apt is ready.

Shortly, after I left and was with my kids and their dad,,I found myself thinking/warning myself of things not to do, things that the ex was always complaining about for example,,,older daughter got into the car and slammed the door as teens do, inside I cringed,,,don’t slam the door it upsets ex,,,,

Watching tv,,I realized my kids were asking my opinion on what to watch and I realized it was ok to give suggestions, I found myself joking with my girls and later when I was tucked into bed with my older daughter,,I found myself giggling with her over a Family Guy episode (I was never aloud to watch that crap at ex’s) and it felt good to laugh and feel happy again.

I have another job interview tomorrow it’s for a seasonal position at a Hallmark store so that’s good, and I’m now reunited with my kitty:

She doesn't like her picture taken,

She doesn’t like her picture taken, scaredy cat.

Most people that I talked too today, are concerned that he will take his anger and revenge out on what little I have left at his place. I truly think and know that he won’t do anything to it,,,mostly because it would inconvenience him to have to make the effort to get rid of my stuff and also because he knows that I will tell his friends and neighbours and that would make him look like the “bad guy”. Also, I don’t really care if he takes his anger out on it, because it’s just stuff and stuff can be replaced with newer stuff.

True to the Narcissistic character descriptions that I have  read I have not heard one word from him,,,I’m gone, he doesn’t care because life simply revolves around him, he truly believes that everyone is wrong and out to get him. I hope he enjoys living in his little wonderful, perfect world.

I pity the next unsuspecting woman who enters that world.

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10 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. merbear74
    Oct 18, 2013 @ 13:19:10

    Good for you sweetie. Stay strong. xx

    Reply

  2. El Guapo
    Oct 18, 2013 @ 13:36:53

    I’m just glad you’re out, and glad that you see some of the effects he was having on you, and you’re already shaking them off.

    Reply

  3. Twindaddy
    Oct 18, 2013 @ 15:45:40

    Glad you’re outta there. Good for you.

    Reply

  4. Aussa Lorens
    Oct 18, 2013 @ 19:05:11

    Good for you for leaving– never look back and don’t trouble yourself wondering about his pathetic little existence. He’s just a slight bump on the road you’re traveling and you’re way past it now.

    Reply

  5. Wendy Powell
    Oct 18, 2013 @ 22:45:19

    One of two things are going to happen now. Either he will find someone new (which would be the best, so prepare yourself for it!) or he’ll try to win you back. either way, know that he will never change. Know that the best predictor of tomorrow’s behaviour is yesterday’s. Good luck. (If you find yourself questioning whether or not to go back–reread your blogs…)

    Reply

    • overitblogdotcom
      Oct 18, 2013 @ 22:52:44

      Oh, he’s probably on the hunt for a new girl and that’s fine with me. I know he won’t try to get me back he’s too much of “the man” to put himself down to that level.
      That is exactly why I have written some of the posts that I have so I have something to look back on. And, hopefully one day they will help someone else. Thanks for the advice 🙂

      Reply

  6. Honey
    Oct 24, 2013 @ 14:05:51

    Wow. Already some healing happening. Thanks for the follow. Maybe “Honey” will give you a smile too. Looks like your learning how to do that again.

    Reply

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